Adoption Questions Answered part 1 of 3

THANK YOU FOR THE QUESTIONS!!  Between my husband Matt and I we wondered (Matt) or asked (Me) before we adopted every question we were asked :)

If you did not catch the last blog post it was titled Adoption Questions Anyone?  Matt agreed to sit down with me and answer questions about our adoption.  Please know that as we answer your questions, our story represents our experience and like a lot of things in life, adoption experiences are all different.

Right now, Matt is laying on our living room couch and I am sitting in the funky maroon chair beside.....my feet propped up on the red fake leather foot stool-

Here we go- This is part 1 of 3 (12 questions total so if your question is not on here it will be on one of the two next posts- The questions are in no particular order)

1. How often do you talk to Ellie's Birth mom/ How do you communicate with her?  Guessing that if you averaged it out we talk about once a month- We mostly text but sometime talk on the phone.  We are also friends on facebook and have each others e-mail address if we choose to use that too.
2. Are you scared Ellie will be resentful that she was adopted when she is older?  We both hope not but know that it may be a possibility- part of the reason we choose an open adoption is we want Ellie to know who her biological family is- Our birth mom Heather has said from the beginning of our adoption process that she wants to be there for Ellie when she gets older if Elle's wants to know why Heather made the choice to place (adoption) instead of parent.  Matt thinks about this possibility less than I do- He figures we will deal with it when/if Ellie battles this- I have prayed A LOT about this issue and grieve for both Ellie and Heather as they both have felt and will feel a loss- Heather more so at the placement (after delivery) and Ellie when she is old enough to realize that while we absolutely adore her and know that God choose her for our family, she also has a biological family that she was not raised with.
3. How have your boys adjusted to having a little sister?  Our middle son Ryan, who is 13 just walked into the room so I asked him this question- He said, 'It's fun having a little sister- (He then switched into his Nacho Libre imitation voice) It's a blessing from God......if you know what I mean!'  I asked Ryan what has been the hardest thing about our adoption- He said that we are not able to do as much stuff (as a family) because Ellie is not able to yet (example would be the boys want to float down the river....sometimes I would join if we have a babysitter but other times Matt takes them and I stay home with Elle's).  I asked Ryan what the funnest thing about having a little sister is- He said 'hanging out with her and getting to play with her.'
4. Are you going to adopt anymore children?  At this point, both of our answer is no BUT we all know that God could turn that around....We are not actively seeking to adopt again- we have been presented with the possible option and still did not feel a tug in our heart to adopt.  Matt and I both feel more of a calling to help those we come into contact with that may be pursuing the option of adoption by way of referring them to the adoption agency we were going through before we adopted Ellie and/or tell them about friends and family members we know who are interested in adopting.

Questions that will be answered in the next two posts:

1. How did you decide what type of adoption (private adoption or through the State)?  
2. Is it expensive to adopt?
3. Where do you begin if you are interested in adoption?  
4. Is it hard having older children and a baby?
5. How did you know for sure you wanted another child- was it just wanting a girl or did you know your family was not complete?
6. Is it hard loving a child that is not biologically yours? 
7. Why did you choose an open adoption?
8. Are you ever worried that Ellie's Birth Parents will want her back?

July 2012