Milk Do's and Don't (and Cake sneezing)

• If one's child is standing over their birthday cake and sneezes (and the sneeze blows out the candles with their snot) DON'T laugh and serve the cake anyway..... (one of my children did this and I, in the back of my mind was telling myself that I should not serve it but instead of listening to that thought I just laughed and served it anyway.......your free to judge me now :) )
• If milk is within 3 days of expiration DONT drink it..........yuck- that's to close to expired.  Who chooses the date anyway- It's better to be safe than sorry when it comes to dairy, chicken, and bad fashion sense!
• On the milk note- If there is only a couple of cups left in the bottom of the milk container DONT drink it........BLAH! Something about the last little bit of milk in the carton is gross- What if, unbeknown to you one of your children had drank out of the carton....that last couple of cups in the bottom of the milk container could be mostly saliva- saliva and milk.....eeeeewww!
• One more about milk...........drinking milk from someone you have just met's house just seems too personal- like the relationship has been stepped up a notch (as opposed to drinking soda, water, or tea).......'Can I get you a glass of milk Steph?'...........uh NOOOOOOOOOOO!
• Speaking about milk and too personal...........drinking milk straight from the cow (like buying it at a dairy or having your own cows that you milk) seems a little to personal too- I've been inside milking barns when cows are being milked- they take poo's when they are hooked up to those milking machines....having the poo so close to the warm milk coming out of the utter is cringe worthy..........Having some personal space from the utter to the consumption just seems like a better choice.....pasteurize that stuff before it comes to my fridge thank you very much.
• OK last one about milk............fat free skim milk looks like human breast milk- It makes me want to gag when I see people drink it.............honestly, if your drinking it for the 'vitamins' go pop a few vitamin D's and save yourself the utter (hee hee....pun) disgustingness of drinking the thin, bluish colored, dank looking liquid (if you are an avid fat free skim milk drinker please don't send me an e-mail about all the reasons why you drink it- No matter what you could ever say to me I will still think its gross)

HAPPY FRIDAY Y'ALL!! 

gross gross gross!!! :)