Come Sit Outside With Me Me Me!

This time last year marked our 22 month in Hawaii- It marked our 12 month of waiting for the right adoption placement........Matt and I were trying to decide whether to stay in Hawaii or move home........My heart was so heavy with longing for our baby, Home Sickness, and missing comfort zone- 2 day's ago over one year ago, I got up in time to see the sun rise.......I had long since forgotten to look at my surroundings with joy and amazement.  When I looked around I would see the same things.......mountains, ocean, green grass, and work- In my mind it was 360 degrees surrounding me at all times-
Just before the sun rose I hear Matt's voice....'come sit outside with me'.......I replied to his request with a shrug as I followed him out the door........We were headed to look at the same mountain I had stared at 1000 times-
As we sat, I looked around me- my eye's were seeing the same thing I had seen so many times before......my heart carrying the same annoyances and burdens- the weight of my self imposed grievances radiating off of me...
I wish I could tell you what my thought process was to make the transition I am about to describe but for the life of me I can't remember (hee! I could sound super spiritual and say I begged God for it)- What I do remember is a firefly looking bug flew over to Matt and I and hovered- Like it was looking right at us- I was completely flattered that it choose to stick around and check us out.......As I was watching it my focus was transitioning from me to it-
He flew away for just a bit and my gaze followed- I picked my eye's up with an expectation that I would see something different than the view I had seen 1000 times before- My expectations exceeded anything I could have imagined- His flight took him around the butterfly bush that was teaming with caterpillars, whizzing by the red bird sitting on the fence post eating bird food, over the red geranium that I had no clue had bloomed, and out into the field where his fellow species were at.......
I wanted to remember the moment- the lesson taught.  I ran inside the house and grabbed my camera.  Wouldn't it be so easy if a simple picture could cause a lesson taught to be a lesson learned!!

While the lesson was taught that March day, I am sad to say I am a slow learner- My view is so often me- my attitude is often petty and filled with annoyances- Think of the moments I've missed and the opportunities passed by because of my refusal to pick my eye's up and look beyond the me me me to the amazing blessings God puts in my path every minute of everyday.

Heavenly Father please help me to live each moment with appreciation- Forgive me for the times I have chosen to keep my focus on myself and turned a moment you had for blessing into a moment of selfishness.

Below are some of the pictures I took on the morning above.

Our firefly looking spectator