the audition for call the midwife!!

Ellie and I twinned this morning for church.

Look, let's be honest, the twinning days are going to end soon.  She's going to be 6 and headed to school- How cool is that when your mom drops you off and your dressed alike.
She's probably not even going to think it's cute when she looks back at pictures (more than likely she'll be horrified).
I get it
I really do
I thought the whole mom/daughter twinning was cheesy looking before Elle's joined our family-
Then she was here and it suddenly all made sense.....yes, dressing alike is adorable not cheesy (as least for me).

After church, I told Elle's that I wanted to get a picture of she and I twinning.  When we were done getting our picture, she asked if we could make a silly face for the last picture.  Ellie wanted us to grab our ears and stick out our tongues.  I hit the auto take on the camera and had the few seconds, before the picture snapped, to get back to the couch where Ellie was and get the cute face on.  I hit the button on my camera to start the timer and for some reason, turned around and grabbed my ears and partially shut my eyes as I ran (pre-prepping for our silly picture).  I don't know if it was the partially shut eyes or the excitement of a twinning picture- something in me decided to run with a fury. When I made it to the couch, I hit it with such force when I sat down, my body literally propelled forward.  The camera clicked.

The picture looks like a real life audition for a baby birth in the show 'Call the Midwife'....you know, those scenes on the show where you swear someone is really delivering a baby and it's not just reenacted for TV.  Seriously guys, I think I would have gotten a spot on an episode if they could have just seen this....
So gross!!!
But so funny!!
BAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!!

Happy Sunday to you :) :) :)

won't back down

I wrote this blog post at the end of February 2016.  We were in Germany at the time while Ryan went through treatment for Lyme Disease.  I didn't publish it the night I wrote it because it felt too raw.  I knew we wouldn't back down from Lyme but I didn't feel strong enough emotionally, at the time, to acknowledge it for the world to read.  There is something that rises up, deep inside my heart, for those suffering with Lyme Disease.  An empathy, a sorrow for what they are enduring on a daily basis, a grief because of how debilitating the Disease is on every level.
I still can't back down from Lyme Disease.  My head wants to- I want to think about other things, leaving all things Lyme behind.  But my heart just won't- How do you discount the suffering someone else is enduring when you know you can help.  Even if the help is just an encouraging word, a prayer, a passing on of information about treatment that helped your own child.
If you have Lyme Disease, please know that my heart and many others heart is for you.  You have people that the Lord has risen up for you, on the outside of your disease, fighting for the answer to your healing.  People, that the Lord has placed a burden on their heart, to research and pour into answers that will help you.
For all of us, those with Lyme and those who have a heart to help those with Lyme, let's not back down.
_____________________________________________
February 2016

Ryan and I were driving back from Stuttgart (Germany), after dropping Debbie and Kristi off to head back to Oregon this past Saturday.  Ryan was playing the music off of his phone through the car's speakers.
'I won't back down' by Jonny Cash came on
I've only heard (or at least paid attention to) Jonny Cash's songs on the movie about his life, Walk the Line, so I wasn't super familiar with the song playing.
After listening to it all the way through I said.....'That's going to be our official Lyme song'

We're not backing down Ry

pat answer christianity

Sometimes, the hardest thing about writing a blog post is the first sentence.  For me, it needs to be just right and then the rest of the post flows.  When I can't get that first sentence pegged, I tell myself that I'm not ready to write the post.  It's just not there yet.  It's still mulling in my brain, the Lord still working it out.  I've been mulling over this blog post for quite some time.  Not knowing how to start it, until today....

I'm tired of pat answer Christianity.

I'm not tired of Christianity, in fact, I love being a Christ following Christian.
But, I'm tired of pat answer Christianity.
Christian slogans thrown around as a blanket covering to sound spiritual.

I don't mean a straight out of the Bible answer that is applicable to the situation at hand, spoken from a heart of genuine care.  Responses that might hurt to hear but come from the empathy and concern of a fellow Christian.  Responses that are God's truth and wisdom, relayed through the human voice, covered in a love that only Christ can instill in us.
I'm talking about answers, in response to a hurt or difficulty, that lack any sort of love.  Answers that may be the 'right' thing to say at the time but delivered from a wrong heart.  Answers filled instead with a coating so think of spirituality your head is left spinning, instead of comforted.  Your better off keeping silent, holding your tongue, asking the Lord to fill your heart with His love and insight for the situation before even a word is spoken.  These types of answers show nothing of Christ.

Sometimes, I think we have to be careful about the spiritual head knowledge we obtain.  We become so learned, so good at consuming Biblical insight, so puffed up with the pride of doctrine, we forget about our heart.  Heart knowledge is a humble learning, a learning gained not for competition or significance sake, but for the sake of loving others better.  For the sake of loving Christ more.  Heart knowledge produces a servants response, pouring out into a situation in whatever way is needed.  Head knowledge usually stays hands off, speaking the right words without a servants heart follow-up.    Head knowledge is usually the one that stands back, observing the situation, having the most judgements about it.  Judgements bore out of the inability to let their own heart be vulnerable before Christ and a pride that says 'I'm better than the person suffering'.

I'm tired of my own pat answers.
Challenged by my own responses to difficult situations.
Praying for the wisdom to have Godly words overflowing with truth and love, compassion and empathy, discernment and understanding.   Praying that even when I am tired, all done, want to have my own brain space, I still turn to the Lord for the strength to have my responses as He would have them.  Praying against communicating with my own empty words that 'sound spiritual', resorting to treating Christianity as a job to be accomplished instead of a relationship to be nurtured.

There is no pat answer to hard times.  Each one comes with it's own set of understandings and learnings for all of us.

There is however a pat answer solution.
It will always be Jesus
Nothing more and nothing less
The key is communicating that pat answer solution without a pat answer Christianity.

Challenging for sure!
Happy Thursday to you all.