Rebuttal Reactions

Rebuttal-  'Rebuttal means an opposing argument in a debate.  A rebuttal is the claim, or proof, that an accusation or argument is false.'

Reaction- 'An action performed or a feeling experienced in response to a situation or event'

Rebuttal Reaction- Actions performed or feelings experienced in the way of an opposing argument or debate in response to a situation or event.

I once read that a new church started on the basis of a rebuttal to another church (or churches or denominations) will inevitably fail. To summarize the article (I wish I could find it to add the link on here) the woman (who has been a pastors wife for years) said that failure comes because the foundation of the church was not based on a calling from the Lord but on a foundation of anger, pride, hurt, etc. This congregation will not stop using rebuttal as their foundation in the structure of their church (thus always being in some sort of dissention) which leads to division and eventually the church dissolves.

The Lord used this article to grab my attention and zero in on some of my rebuttal reactions- To really look at the basis for my strong opinions/reactions and, using God's discerning wisdom, figure out if my strong opinions/reactions (which were usually causing some sort of division and dissention relationally with other Christians in my life) were based on God's truth or simply a rebuttal to a previous experience I had had..............

It was surprising how many of my opinions and reactions were simply 'my opinion'  rebuttals....absolutely nothing to do with Godliness but simply my strong will reacting to the situation with my opinion (and not God's). 

The Lord has been using this awareness to make me pause (sometimes before and sometimes after if I get ahead of myself and fall back into my old reactions) and question what the foundation of my opinions are- a mental checklist follows:

• Is what I am negatively reacting to really a salvation saving issue (sin spelled out in the Bible) or simply a difference of opinion.  If it is a sin, absolutely confront it (Matt 18) in a Biblical manner with scripture backing you up and love leading the way.  It is surprising how often it is not a sin what the other person is doing but simply a different way of doing things than I would.
• Is expressing my opinion for the persons good (again the non sinful things- we are always called to confront sin) or is it me simply needing to vent my view (causing damage to the relationship).
• If what the other person is doing or expressing is getting me all fired up (again not the salvation saving issues) is it because I am battling an insecurity that I am not willing to face (this usually ends up being the root of my strong reactions to non sinful things- the Lord allowing a situation to touch on one of my insecurities so that He can lovingly heal me of it).........

It is so humbling for this opinionated strong willed mama to filter my rebuttal reactions......... To  react out of Godliness and not out of a previous hurt or current insecurity means a whole-lota-less reactions and a whole-lota-more holding my tongue...............

Heavenly Father thank you so much that 'Your desire is for what is true in the inner parts: in the secrets of my soul you will give me knowledge of wisdom' (Ps. 51:6).

If I Were A Butcher on Not a Meatless Monday...

In my house, we are meat and potato kind of people- No Meatless Monday's over here- No Sir-eee- My husband Matt grew up on a Dairy Farm eating the meat from those dairy heifers that stopped producing milk (If my sister Jodi were a heifer she would be the queen of all of the herd- She pumped out like 15 ounces of milk from one side when her son, the man child Toby, did not nurse for a couple of hours).  Matt's family would eat meat every night (mostly beef) and we have carried on the same tradition.

When we have the option, we will buy a beef (from a local farmer)- This year we did the 'usual' and bought the local farmers beef- What was unusual about this year is another butcher (we have had the same butcher cut and wrap for years and years) did the kill, cut, and wrap (Kill fee $50 cut and wrap .55 cents a pound- I think)...........

It's whoo of us who choose how we want our beef cut and wrapped to pay attention to the cuts of meat our family eats- for instance, one should not order round steak and neck bone (neck bone.........what is that- 'Yes, could I please have an order of your neck bone soup....say's NO ONE ever!!) if all it does is sit in the freezer year after year while all the hamburger, roast, and steaks go.  It's also whoo of us to know who does the talking to the butcher to order how you would like your beef cut up.  For instance when my Matt someone's husband get's the call from the butcher and wants to make the phone call fast because of being busy say's to the butcher 'Why don't you make that 500# of beef all into hamburger patties this year'.......... I don't think the butcher knew what to do when I stood there and cried as he loaded that 500# of patties into my car (I was planning on fabulous steaks and roasts).........We ate hamburger patties in ways I never knew existed over that year (Matt has never been allowed to order again).

Back to this year's new butcher- When placing the order I decided that due to changing up the menu a bit in our house I was going to order a large amount of stew meat- It's easy to throw in a crock pot, cook for the day, and make into all sorts of delicious dishes (Stroganoff, stew, bbq'd pulled beef, etc.). 

A few nights back I pulled Matt into the kitchen...We both stared at the stew meat quickly defrosting with the plastic wrapped throughout- As it defrosted just enough to start breaking apart I would do what I have done since getting our beef- pull little bits of plastic wrapping out of the stew meat- wait for a bit and then pull more out......when all the plastic is finally out, I throw into the crock pot and get on about my day......After watching for a bit Matt walked out of the kitchen- To his back I said,

 

'If I were a butcher I would make sure when I wrapped the stew meat I did not wrap it so that it had to be defrosted so that the plastic wrapping could be picked out before cooking'

It's the little things that make life so much easier..............stew meat that comes busting out of the package in one giant heap without plastic wrapped throughout.................the little things.......

Happy not a Meatless Monday!!

Seventeen...Just for a moment

I know I am not the first mother to experience her child getting older............but it is the first time for this mother....my first born

I don't know if others feel this way but the thought of my Eli turning 17 tomorrow is baffling- I sat at our local Sheri's Restaurant tonight and told him, over his voice telling me to stop because he has heard the story a million times before, the story of his labor.........the story of his birth.....and the story of our long time family friend (and second father to My Matt) Pat seeing a few days old Eli and wrinkling his nose up, looking at me and asking in a very loud voice (mind you to a new mother) 'What the HECK happened to him?' to which I replied in an equally loud voice 'You pee out a lemon with no pain medication and let's see what that lemon looks like when your done.........and let's see how you feel!!' (Eli's red birth mark located smack dab in the middle of his forehead eventually went away)............

All of it running together in my mind tonight only this year with a bit more urgency.....my baby boy is almost grown up.... 

The clock ticked slow year after year- baby phase, toddler phase, first grade, second grade, loosing his first tooth, third grade, first motorcycle, fourth grade......the clock started ticking a bit faster as fifth and sixth grade started......junior high........moving to Hawaii........moving home from Hawaii.........fifteen with his permit made the clock start ticking almost out of control...........We adopted Ellie....and in the blink of an eye our Eli turned sixteen........and now seventeen.

Seventeen just for a moment.....

Just long enough for the last glimpses of my boys childhood to get it's finishing touches...

Did we say enough, did we talk Jesus enough, did we live Jesus enough, will the parenting failures be righted by God's grace and our child's grace........

4:39 a.m. on May 17,1996 born to Matt and Stephanie was a boy...a perfect baby boy with a big red mark on his forehead.............hee hee hee hee hee hee!! Daddy and I love you so much Eli Ben- we are so proud of you- Happy (almost) Birthday Son.

A Cart Full of Camping Food

As I was pushing my cart around our local discount super market (buying groceries for a camping trip we took a few weeks ago) I happened to glace down and laugh to myself as I took inventory of my almost full cart- Then I grabbed my beaten up camera (to many bribes of letting Elle's hold it only to have her throw it on the ground) and snapped a pic.........

Graham Crackers/Hershey Chocolate Bars/Marshmallows.......CHECK
Hot Dogs, Cookies, Chips.....................CHECK
Red Vines...............CHECK
Cinnamon Rolls...........CHECK
Coffee & Coffee Creamer.............DOUBLE CHECK

(I also remembered to buy toilet paper this time- note to self it does not automatically just 'appear' in the travel trailer....somebody has to buy it and place it in there!)

There really is something special about a cart full of camping food!

(now it's just the actual camping this chic needs to get a bit more used to)

Celebrating 192 Years of Marriage

Four of us ladies were standing together yesterday, all celebrating the anniversary of a wonderful couple.  Duane and Linda were celebrating their 40th Wedding Anniversary.  Just for the fun of it we went around the circle of 4 and said how long we had been married (the anniversary we would be celebrating this year)..... 52 years, 46 years, 35 years, 19 years .  It is a beautiful thing, the celebration of Anniversary's each year- To be honest, it's a beautiful thing, the celebration of marriage on a daily basis.  I don't know all of your marriage stories but I do know that marriage is not easy nor is it always fun- It is a lot of hard work!! The struggle to get over self, learning to compromise, re defining reactions, the list could go on....Each day of marriage is a celebration of God creating man and woman to fit together- Letting God re-define us so that we mold and fit with our mate better- to Love each other like God loves us............

Wayne and Dee are celebrating 52 years
Dave and Darlene.... 46
Duane and Linda...40
Pete and Kathy..... 35
Matt and I... 19

Add those all up and we are celebrating 192 years of Marriage!!

Thank you Lord Jesus for our Marriages........

Happy Monday to you all and let's not forget to Celebrate our Marriages today :)

Fashion Finds............Fraap!!

O.K. so I saw one of my facebook friends finish a spunky sentence she wrote with the word Fraap....
I have no clue what that means (hopefully not something inappropriate...hee!) but think it sounds like an edgy add to this blog post title- Like it is an extra exclamation point with a sassy edge- Alright enough about Fraap.....let's get the important stuff............Fashion Finds-
Wait! I thought of what Fraap sounds like to me in my mind- Sometimes when I say something to Matt that solves a question we have been mulling over and he gives me that look like 'How in the world did you figure that out?' I will give him that eye brow up look and a smile and say 'BOO-YA'!! I add emphasis to my voice and raise it a couple of levels to let him know that 'Oh Ya Baby, I've got it going on'...................That is what Fraap sounds like............'Found me a FABULOUS Fashion Find Today........FRAAP!'
About that Fashion Find (which must be capitalized to show it proper respect)....
Several years back I, just for the fun of it, tried on a pair of overly priced flip flops with the name brand 'Tory Burch'- As soon as my foot slipped into those sandals I purposed in my mind that ever given the chance (like finding them for a whole lot of dollars less than retail) I would own a pair- Last year I stalked e-bay all summer for a pair of Miss Burch's designs (again, at an affordable price) to no avail.
Earlier this week I got a text from my friend Deb 'What are you doing Thurs.'
To which I replied...Well, I was going to do hair BUT wanna hang out and go shopping?
My kindred shopping friend replied with the only proper answer that one can respond with when shopping runs in your veins almost as strong as loving Jesus does....smile....
ABSOLUTELY!
Our first stop, tucked away in a small college town about fifteen minutes away, was an upscale second hand store....
As I stood in front of all the shoes my eyes stopped on a darling pair of white wedge sandals in my size- I could not believe it when I saw the emblem blaring on the front of them-
'Deb! Have you ever heard of Tory Burch?'
She gave me that look like 'Do I look daft to you? Of course I've heard of Tory Burch' But out of her mouth came 'Yes'
'Do you think these are Tory Burch's?'
Out came Deb's fancy phone that has the internet at the punch of a button............
We both confirmed in our minds what Tory's signature emblem looked like and realized that I was holding the real thing...
The real thing had a $4.00 price tag

FRAAP ladies............F to the R to the A to the A to the P!!

Jonathan 'Bao Gui' Is Coming Home...Praise God!

I am working on a new computer and am trying to learn a new program....please excuse the awkward font and format of this post :)

Hanging on my refrigerator is an invitation to an Adoption Shower for Jonathan Daniel (also known by his Chinese name 'Bao Gui')- The shower was over a month ago (March) but I keep it up as a reminder to Pray and Praise God for little Jonathan and as a reminder to lift his forever family (my friend Lisa, her husband Daniel, and their 4 children) up in prayer

There are some reading this that will remember a blog post I 'posted' almost 2 years ago (see the post at the bottom of this page).  Since posting this, Lisa and Daniel have endured many obstacles on their road to get their son.........Through all of the obstacles Daniel and Lisa have never given up!

Lisa had this to say about the 'in between' of the last 2 years waiting for Jonathan.....

'The adoption process has many steps and LOTS of paperwork. Fingerprints were taken, background checks run, reference letters were written, a carbon monoxide detector was installed, finally a home study was completed.  Through the support of friends, a garage sale and bake sale helped to meet some of the early fees.  Many miracles had already taken place just to get this far in the process.  Days from sending their approved home study to the United States Immigration Office for approval, Daniel was laid-off from his job.  The adoption was put on hold. 

By March of 2012 it became clear that completing the adoption was no longer possible.  With broken hearts we submitted a letter asking for their adoption file to be closed and to be withdrawn as his prospective parents.  It was a loss that was difficult to express.  Would people understand that they were grieving the loss of a son, even though he hadn’t died and they had not yet become his parents? 

His picture stayed on the kitchen window sill and silent prayers were sent from a broken mother’s heart, hopeful that God could restore what had been lost.

When things are impossible in our eyes and we have no resources of our own to boast in, God receives all the glory.

 

With our hope in God and His power to save, we asked if it was possible to try again.  Daniel’s new job no longer met the Chinese income requirement, so they requested a waiver and prepared to fast as they waited for an answer from the Chinese government.  Friends from Canada, Indonesia, China, and beyond joined with them in prayer as they waited to see if an exception would be made.  God moved mountains and it was granted.  With great excitement, we were miraculously able to start his adoption again in July of 2012.  The miracles have continued to unfold: one fee was completely waived, other fees were reduced, a grant was applied toward his referral fee.  Friends who share a passion to see orphans joined with families have provided help and support. 

BaoGui means “Precious Treasure.”  In the book of Matthew we are encouraged to store up our treasures in heaven, where moths and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.  Adoption is an expression of love.   More than mere words, it says, “You are loved.  You are special.  You are worth more than any earthly treasure.”  His adoption was not done in human strength, but through God’s great power.  He is a precious treasure who will be given a family name and be pointed to his Savior.  Prayerfully he will choose to accept God’s love and know his heavenly Father too.'

In just a few short days (May 3, 2013) Lisa will be on a plane to China to pick Jonathan up and bring him home- If you think of it would you join me in prayer over the next couple of weeks as Lisa and Jonathan make the transition from Jonathan's Orphanage (where he currently is) to the care of Lisa and then back to the States to join his forever family.  We will also be praying for Lisa's health and safety as she travels by herself and for the health of her 4 kiddo's and husband that will be back here in the States.

A current picture of Jonathan!

 

Friday, July 15, 2011

Bringing Precious Bao Gui Home......

As I walked up to a BBQ that my sister had invited me to this past Wed. night (thanks for the invite sis) I already knew that my child hood friend Lisa was going to be there- My sister had mentioned it as we had chatted on the phone about what side dishes we were going to be bringing (she was bringing cream cheese filled peppers and I was bringing cantelope and chips).  The great thing about child hood friends is that you can go with out talking  for years and years yet when you see each other you have an instant connection- 
I had followed Lisa on face book for the past several years and knew by both talking to her and by face book that she and her husband had added to their family of 4 (they have 2 biological children) 2 additional blessings- These blessings came by way of an International adoption from China.  We instantly started talking about their adoption story.........we then talked about Ellie's adoption story........As the conversation continued, I learned that Lisa and her husband Daniel felt a very strong calling to adopt one more precious blessing from China-  A little boy with significant medical needs named Bao Gui (pronounced Bow-Way).  As Lisa started describing the situation surrounding Bao Gui I felt a stirring very deep in my heart- As Lisa talked on, I knew that I was supposed to share her story with all of you.......my blog friends-


May God Bless and keep little Bao Gui as he awaits his placement with his Daniel and Lisa as his forever family.........

BELOW IS BAO GUI'S STORY AS TOLD BY LISA:

Bao Gui

I guess it’s really BaoGui’s story and it began long before our family knew of his need, before our hearts were touched by his sweet smile and before we knew we were called to bring him home. He was abandoned shortly after birth, most likely due to medical needs that his birth parents were unable to provide for. After being taken into the orphanage he was placed in a group foster home for children with severe medical needs. Under the care of Morning Star Foundation, BaoGui’s basic needs have been met; but his greatest need remains unmet. He needs a family, a family who will love him and advocate for him. A family that will love him just the way his body was created, but also fight to bring healing to his little body where possible. He is awaiting surgery to reverse the colostomy that he has had since infancy and is also most likely deaf, though we do not have any medical details pertaining to his failed hearing tests.  

Our love for the children of China has grown deeper and deeper as our family has grown. Having adopted two of our children from China (both through waiting children / special needs programs) we know the difference that a family can make in the life of a child who has only known uncertainty and loss. We want to make that difference in BaoGui’s life, but the financial obligations that come with an adoption have kept us from being able to move forward with the next step. We have been approved by China to adopt BaoGui, but we need to complete our dossier in order to apply for his visa and bring him home. Right now we need to raise $2,500 to complete our home study through Holt International. We are praying for families to come alongside ours to make this possible. Each adoption is a miracle and a tangible expression of love. More than mere words, it says, “You are loved. You are special. You are worth more than any earthly treasure.”

BaoGui’s name translates “Precious Treasure.”

Our family has been forever blessed by adoption; I pray that many more families would also be blessed as they join us and become a part of BaoGui’s story.

“But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not

destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

Matthew 6:20-21